Borderlands (2024) Movie Review

Based on the successful video game franchise, Borderlands is a 2024 action-adventure sci-fi movie directed by Eli Roth, who also co-wrote the film with an unknown writer named Joe Crombie. The film had a good cast with many familiar faces such as Cate Blanchett, Ariana Greenblatt, Kevin Hart, Jack Black and Jamie Lee Curtis. Roth has stated that this is supposed to be his Barbarella (1968) tribute for the new era. 

A film inspired by the games had been planned as far back as 2011 but it wasn't until 2021 when they actually started shooting. After watching the finished film, director Tim Miller (Deadpool, Terminator: Dark Fate) was brought in by the studio executives for reshoots in 2023. These reshoots were apparently extensive and completely changed the film in the editing room.

A box office failure, the film was also panned by both critics and audiences across the globe. Often being cited as one of the worst video games movies and among the worst of 2024. Is it really? or is that an exaggeration?

Space bounty hunter Lilith (Cate Blanchett) is hired by Atlas, a powerful magnate, to rescue his daughter, Tina (Ariana Greenblatt), at Pandora (Lilith's home planet). Once there, she meets several misfits who join her as she finds out about Atlas' real motivations and secrets. 

It really sticks to the screenwriting mantra of "make each plot point interesting and add more conflict to any scene that you can" which makes for some rather fun twists and turns inside the structure of each scene. In that sense, you get some inventive sequences every now and then that break any type of monotony and when you mix that up with a fast pace and constant movement you get the film at its best: as a serviceable and entertaining romp.

The worst parts aren't as prominent but they really stick with you. For starters there's nothing new or truly original about its story, it's all bare bones and very by-the-book at its core, which can only amount to so much. The small robot, Claptrap, is also quite annoying, that's really the most awful comedic part (aside from some of Kevin Hart's quips), it's hardly a total dealbreaker, but it's somewhat constant.

The action is well thought and decently shot overall, with good stunts and creative choreographies that are visually quite imaginative. I can see the influence Barbarella had on Roth, to a point, but this reminds me more of a crappy Star Wars rip off or Galaxina (1980) more than anything and it's sort of funny seeing that style of filmmaking in a modern day blockbuster movie based on a video game.

Blanchett has a great time with her role as a stern but unclean bounty hunter, like a modern version of spaghetti western protagonists. The best performance in the picture. Jamie Lee Curtis is alright but the director never used her much. Ariana Greenblatt is cheeky and funny, she has her moments as a cute mayhem girl. The rest I can take or leave. That's a big problem because they never get intimate moments or even good chemistry among them, so their relationships seem rushed and stale sometimes.

I can really only recommend it to those who watch a lot of movies. Hear me out. If you are used to low rent movies and have been exposed to strange, offbeat and quirky genre films you can probably get that vibe here with more entertainment value. Otherwise, it's not something noteworthy.

Bubblegum Crisis (1987-1991) OVA Review and Retrospective - Episode 2: Born to Kill

This second Bubblegum Crisis episode explores the relationship between Linna and Irene. Irene's boyfriend was murdered for his knowledge of GENOM's Boomer conspiracy. 

Meanwhile, Priss continues to get closer to Leon, who is useful for inside information of the AD Police. However, Irene's life is in danger as her decision to uncover GENOM's secrets becomes deadly when assassin androids are sent after her, only the Knight Sabers can fight them.

Here we have a very emotional and even gut wrenching episode. Irene is a very tragic character who we really feel bad for, despite having very little screen time, this is because of the writers' solid grasp on economic storytelling and their ability to summarize everything you need to know about a character and their emotional struggles in very short scenes.

Another thing I liked was how we get to see the girls in their typical jobs once more, we can witness how their operation works and what every one of them brings to the team. For example, Linna's chats with Irene take place in her aerobics class. We also see their normal lives a bit more.

The lady Boomers are a needed addition, I love their designs and their highly intimidating demeanor, being able to overpower Priss at the start of the episode. They are established as dangerous enemies and the climactic battle confirms their skills and powers, the final battle delivers the first class action we might expect from the show at this point.

It's a pleasing second episode that goes further than the first OVA and adds more pathos than before, expands the lore and makes the plot develop properly.

Vampirella Helliday Special (2024) Comic Review

This new Vampirella Christmas Special was written by Frank Tieri (several Deadpool comics, Red Sonja comics, Vampironica New Blood) and illustrated by Mariano Benitez Chapo (Savage Tales 2022) and Pasquale Qualano (Hell Sonja, Samurai Sonja, Gargoyles Quest, Harley Quinn Road Trip Special).

First we see Vampirella arrive at a house just in time to save some kids from an evil, bloodthirsty Santa Claus with fangs. We are introduced to the narrator: Snowman Steve, who tells the story of how this came to be. Elves and workers at Santa's workshop have been dying recently, a vampire is the prime suspect. However, Ms. Claus doesn't believe it. Vampirella is then called in to stop the newly vampiric Santa Claus once and for all.

It's a hilarious and irreverent Christmas satire, it hits all the expected bits (Santa's workshop being exploitive, Santa being sleazy with a bad marriage) but executes the jokes with such good writing that it makes them refreshing once more. Some quick and witty humor, sometimes with references but never to an annoying degree.It's short but charismatic, Vampirella is her usual cheeky self and causes a lot of carnage. 

It's a clever and well done alternative Christmas special that its audience can appreciate. If you like Vampirella, you can get this one and have a good time. 

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Bubblegum Crisis (1987-1991) OVA Review and Retrospective - Episode 1: Tinsel City Rhapsody

Bubblegum Crisis was a Japanese OVA cyberpunk series created by Toshimichi Suzuki. It follows a group of women who dress up in mechanical exoskeletons, they are known as the Knight Sabers, and battle against biomechanical villains (mainly robotic beings named Boomers) in a futuristic Japan in the not-too-distant future year of 2032. The concept was tested by Suzuki in 1982 as Techno Police 21C, which had a similar concept. Suzuki took inspiration from a variety of sci-fi action media like Streets of Fire, Blade Runner and maybe a bit of Mad Max, to the point of recreating the opening sequence of Streets of Fire in this first episode, which makes for a highlight.

The central characters are all distinct and colorful (literally), all of them designed by the great Ken'ichi Sonoda (Gunsmith Cats, Gall Force, Wanna-Be’s). 

We have Priss, a singer and dancer who also likes motorcycles and is sort of the focus of the show. There's Sylia, the leader of the Knight Sabers and daughter of the scientist who created the Boomers. Syl has the technology to fight the creatures and runs a lingerie shop as a cover. Linna is a stylish but formal woman, an aerobics instructor who was recruited. Nene is a short, pink haired girl who works for the police force. Mackie is the male of the team and he is an assistant (works mostly from the headquarters). A very lovely line up that we will explore in the following retrospectives.

This first episode introduces us to the world in quite an astounding way. A lot of establishing shots and a captivating sequence that features Priss preparing for her show and singing Hurricane. At the same time, there's a boomer attack that's stopped by one of the Knight Sabers in their iconic armor. After the concert, Priss encounters policeman Leon McNichol, who develops a crush on her. 

The girls meet and discuss their next mission: to rescue a mysterious little girl named Cynthia, but the strange thing is that the kidnappers happen to be Boomers (that's not the only surprise).

It's hard to do justice to these classics, but I gotta say that it's praised and placed among the very best OVA anime series that you can find for many good reasons. I loved the simple but effortlessly conveyed story that is impeccably illustrated and expressed by its gorgeous visuals, via dynamic, detailed and fluidly animated action sequences. The tone that it manages to create purely on audiovisual terms is both melancholic, energetic, dazzling and rhythmic.

You can see that Priss takes pretty much center stage here, indicating that she is gonna be the main character, the director seems to be very much in love with her as well. Not a bad choice but, as we will see, all of the girls will get their time to shine. We get to see some of their dramatic backstories (mostly Sylia's) as well as comedic moments done through silly decisions that say a lot about the characters involved.

At 47 minutes this episode is a bit packed because it has to establish and set up a lot of stuff, like the world, the characters, backgrounds, the politics, the lore and the dynamics between all of those things and how they relate to each other. A great start that I totally recommend to anyone interested.