Dark Match (2024) Movie Review

Dark Match is a wrestling satanic horror action film written and directed by Lowell Dean, and starring Ayisha Issa, Steven Ogg, Sara Canning, and wrestling star Chris Jericho. The film generated mixed reviews and some scepticism among people who dislike movies that feature WWE stars but eventually it was released to some notoriety in the streaming service Shudder.

In the late eighties, Nicky (Ayisha Issa), known as Miss Behave in the ring and a female wrestler working for a small promotion company named SAW, travels to a weird little village for a private event where dangerous cult members, lead by a former wrestler known as The Prophet, are to attend. Things escalate and the cult members become bloodsthirsty, sacrifices are made hoping to bring the devil to our world and now Nicky, along with a manager who she had a troubled relationship with (Steven Ogg), and other companions, must escape and defeat the devil worshippers.

The film's biggest dealbreaker to me is the fact that it's never really committed to its craziness and potentially delirious storyline and tone, it's all hampered by the fact that everything feels halfway done. I don't know if it's a budget problem but the fight sequences never reach any overblown crescendo or kooky intensity one would expect from the director of films like Wolf Cop, it's all muffled and flavorless.

To add to its imperfections, Miss behave is sidelined for most of runtime since she steps back to let Steven Ogg drive the story for a fair amount of the duration. This is hardly a major flaw as Ogg is very enjoyable to watch but it's all at the expense of the heroine's agency and predominance in the narrative throughline. I really wish it wasn't as timid with its violence and its characters. Someone needed to up the ante and add a deranged energy that could help it.

The retro grindhouse grainy and dirty style with colorful lighting and unclean visuals add a ton of atmosphere and convey the exploitation-like throwback attitude the film wants to portray and be faithful to but it doesn't properly elevate the insanity that a satanic wrestling movie should most likely contain to deliver the goods. No amount of color can save the plain and empty scenarios and sets. Barely any real gore, no sleazy nudity and it hardly rejoices in its filthiness enough to make it stand out in the sea of faux grindhouse flicks out there.

The wrestling ladies and their manic matches are fun and it has a funny ending (that also cops out) but otherwise Dark Match is a highly unremarkable horror/slasher movie that it's probably just a rental or a casual watch if you can stream it for free.

Shadow Force (2025) Movie Review

Shadow Force is a 2025 action thriller film directed by Joe Carnahan starring Kerry Washington, Omar Sy, Mark Strong, Da'Vine Joy Randolph, Cliff "Method Man" Smith, Sala Baker and Natalia Reyes. It was written by Carnahan himself and Leon Chills. It's also the first film to be released by the new Lionsgate Studios.

Kyrah (Kerry Washington) and Isaac (Omar Sy) are two ex-special forces group members, one known as Shadow Force, who live peacefully after deserting since they fell in love and decided to leave that life to raise their child, Ky. Assassins are constantly sent after them by their former director/leader Jack Cinder (Mark Strong), but after an incident during a bank robbery both end up on the run as Cinder closes in on them as he assembles the remaining members of the Shadow Force.

The film mostly treads on known territory and displays a very high amount of cliches and stereotypes that one would expect from such a premise (parents who are agents with a kid who is mostly unaware, comedic sidekicks that don't amount to much, one liners and a lot of exposition regarding the organization they work for) but never actually does much with the concept aside from following the expected plot points and narrative devices that action films of this kind often employ. It's decently shot but a lot of its cinematography boils down to functional uninteresting shots with a cold and realistic color scheme that feels mostly bland and uninspired.

It all comes to life in the expected climactic battle that shows some forceful and intense brawlings and shootouts between the mercenaries and killers involved that actually makes it feel a bit more personal and familiar than one would expect. Every punch, kick and blow can definitely be felt as the director has proven to be very competent when it comes to action sequences both choreography-wise and cinematically-wise, there's even a very interesting game between the senses (sound and image) that it's linked to a character's disability that's actually a bit inventive and helps the film stand out a bit.

For the most part, the family conflicts are contrived and reach their peak way too early while the rest develops in a dehydrated and deflated manner that is bogged down by a slow pace and stale visuals. The main heroine is a bit entertaining but you don't get to know her quite well. In many ways, this is the opposite of One Battle After Another in the sense that these are parents with a troubled past trying to escape it (even with the mother dating the bad guy previously) but having it come back to haunt them, this time mom and dad fought for the bad guys unintentionally. 

Only for action movie buffs but not recommended for anyone else.

Dirty Pair: Project Eden (1987) Anime Movie Review

After the cancellation of the original TV series based on the light novels by Haruka Takachiho was cut short, the Dirty Pair would move to the big screen while the last two episodes remained unreleased and Affair On Nolandia was released for the OVA market (not to mention a new OVA series being prepared to release the following year). The theatrical film was titled Dâti pea Gekijô-ban, Dirty Pair: Project Eden in North America, and direction duties were handled by Bee Train creator Kôichi Mashimo (Noir, Dominion Tank Police, .hack//SIGN, Madlax, Cazador de la bruja), the script was written by Hiroyuki Hoshiyama (Urusei Yatsura, Patlabor, Lily C.A.T.) and character designer/animation director Tsukasa Dokite worked on the film as well, which ended up being released on the 14th of march of 1987.

After stopping a gang of smugglers, 3WA agents Kei and Yuri (a.k.a The Lovely Angels, a.k.a The Dirty Pair) are sent to planet Agerna, rich in the mineral known as Vizorium, in a secret mission to investigate mysterious attacks performed on the local refinement plants, which increase tensions between two nations fighting for the mineral, Uldas and Edia. Smuggler Carson D. Carson follows the Angels to an abandoned plant and the three of them begin to be attacked by bioengineered monsters created by Dr. Wattsman, a mad scientist bent on dominating the world by pushing evolution to its next level.

God bless the animators for elevating what it’s probably one of the weakest Dirty Pair entries. First of all, the visual flair on display is dazzling and astounding in a way that old cel animation could only be, the stylish visuals condense information and transmit mood in abstract but appropriate ways, the flashing colors, the fluidity of movement and minute details really show off the talent of the people behind the animation, the precise and delightful expressions and body animations are also top notch and convey emotion in just the right ways. It's a visual masterpiece. It’s just a shame that the actual story and plotting aren't up to par.

During the first few minutes we see all of the potential as the introduction establishes our protagonists and their way of working, these are scenes of maximum enjoyment and highly loveable craft on display. The expository scenes are understandable as their first briefing begins, but it quickly goes downhill once the new character, Carson, comes into play. The story takes a turn for the worse as we are bored with the worst “romantic” plotline in the entire franchise, forgettable and underdeveloped villains and a dull character with unexplained (and inconsistent) superhuman powers, this is the overall problem: an incoherent mess that goes beyond just cartoon logic and by the end when you see a lightsaber not being able to cut through a knife (I assume is a futuristic one, but still) you feel like this is way too illogical to actually enjoy.

The absence of verisimilitude can break a story. One can excuse a couple of convenient resolutions, characters using inappropriate weapons just because it looks cool, maybe even an uncomfortable outfit or creative liberties with stuff like space travelling, but when what you established before in your world/story doesn't make sense anymore you are in big trouble and this movie doesn't have the weight of character drama or a strong enough conflict to pull it off. When your main villain has to recite his plan in detail and is reduced to a bunch of phrases stating his plan without much behind it I begin to lose all interest.

When Dirty Pair tries to pull off romance it’s often when it fails, the best romance was the one we never saw on the screen (the episode with Yuri trying to meet her childhood love). The overly sentimental music and silly expressions the film tries to use at the end don't feel emotional, it’s not audiovisual expression, it’s just empty manipulation that’s unearned.

Don't get me wrong, the typical stuff you expect from a Dirty Pair movie can be seen here: Kei and Yuri being their silly selves taking improvised baths and bickering, the action sequences with them blasting biologically mutated nightmares are astounding and anything that involves a comedic set-piece with the girls is actually effective in how well constructed they are (shot by shot, frame by frame, you can see the animation skills). So it’s not a worthless movie if you are actually just looking for a very fantastically animated action movie. I know it’s going for “over-the-top” but it only barely achieves it, the rest is actually just nonsensical.

Disappointing but with a lot of technical merit to it.

Red Sonja New Year's Special 2025

We have yet another New Year's special with the redhaired warrior from the Hyborian age that compliments her Holiday special from last year. Written by Dan Panosian and illustrated by Valeria Burzo, in this new one-shot we see Sonja being hired by a pair of townspeople who seek the she-devil for her skills in combat to face against some giants who terrorize the town, once there she will meet the people of the town, who are celebrating the eve of a new moon, an event that requires the sacrifice of a fire woman.

The initial set-up of the storyline seems incredibly trite at first but the writer knows how to spin things around a bit and never allows it to become generic or forceful, from the start the somewhat skeletal story begins planting questions and intrigue that will eventually pay off later in the story. It is somewhat predictable if you are familiar with this type of plot but you actually enjoy it because of the small twists that keep things moving without fat or rest, while the mostly visual storytelling also carries a great deal of the baggage very effectively. The snow white surroundings contrast appropriately with Red Sonja's fiery red hair, something that aids the storyline and feels relevant to it, while the action portrayed moves and looks fluid enough from panel to panel.

Recommended for Red Sonja fans.

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